Before I begin, let me just say that if anyone else were to tell the following story I would be incredulous to say the least. I am, however, an honest little wheat freak, so believe me when I tell you that walking past a bakery can be bad for your health.
I had the markets this morning. It was a gorgeous day, bright and shiny. I got to play with puppies, gossip the day away and paint myself silly. Ten came to help pack up and I bought roses and stuff to make a baked dinner because Shelley is coming over with her new fiance, who I am meeting for the first time. Very exciting ;)
After the markets I came home and arranged the flowers, tidied up a bit, had a glass of ice cold Sav Blanc. Then I realised that I needed quince paste and passionfruit, so I drove to the shops, only noticing at the checkout that I was still wearing my paint smeared apron and Widget badge.
On the way out to my car I walked past the bakery. This is where we enter the strange place. As I passed, a baker (packing up for the day) shook out a sack of flour, about a metre to my left. The wind picked up the flour and blew it onto me. This is problematic, you see, because I am such a delicate flower that just one tiny breadcrumb will induce anaphylaxis.
You know, I've mused in the past about what would happen if I were to be the unhappy receipient of a flour bomb on muckup day. Or what would the result of a bakery tour be? Curiosity is sated now :P I saw it coming, but there were too many people around to avoid it. So I held my breath and walked to the bathrooms (thank gawd I have swimmer's lungs), washed off my face and glasses, checked the colour of my epipen and jammed that wand of awesomeness into my upper thigh.
I know by this point of the story you might possibly be thinking "Oh Goodness! How terrifying!" or some such, but I have to tell you it is anything but.
It was freaky, I'll give you that. I mean seriously, what are the odds? That one of the very few people in the city that is that allergic to wheat should walk into flour sack fallout. Hehe well that's just my crazy luck.
I still can't believe it happened. I feel wierd writing about it. But I'm buzzing like Russell Brand pre-rehab and I'm pretty sure that I could take on the entire cast of Heroes right now and still make a passionfruit slice. That may be the adrenalin talking.
I am kind of pissed off, it's not an ideal situation. On the other hand, I know (have always known) that I am a frigging ninja when I need to be. It's kind of awesome to know that when the shit hits the fan, I can look after myself. A needle to the thigh may seem drastic, but to me it is the reset button.
It lets me start again.
Thankyou epipen, I heart you.
Free Colouring Sheets
4 years ago